Marc: say something funny
Dave: something funny
Dave: OMG TEH FUNNNY
Marc: HAR HAR HAR
Dave: < .<
Marc: >.>
Dave: !!!
Archive for February, 2006
Something funny goes here
Monday, February 27th, 2006The Awesome Show: Ep. 6
Sunday, February 26th, 2006Another delicious installment.
Click the pic and be whisked away to Episode 6: Slander. The first installment of our new weekend caller show brings you Boner Jones and his rants about fast food, Dave and Marc’s Olympics update, Charles in Charge, the news, and more.
Call in to The Awesome Show at 323-319-6485 and leave us your voicemails!
Local Girl’s Car Antics Leave Authorities Searching for Answers
Friday, February 24th, 2006EL PASO, TX — A local girl has returned home from the hospital after escaping relatively unscathed from the burning wreckage of her parents 1989 Chrysler LeBaron. The girl had disappeared from her El Paso home late last Wednesday, and was later discovered to have stolen her family’s car, in an apparent attempt to jump it over a crudely made dirt ramp. The incident has left local authorities scrambling to determine what could’ve influenced the girl to try such a dangerous stunt.
The girl, 12-year-old Michelle Perens, was first reported missing last Wednesday by her mother, local florist LeAnne Perens. “I went to her room to check on her, to give her some ice cream [before bed.] She wasn’t in there. She was nowhere in the house. I panicked and called 911. I still don’t know how she managed to get the car out of the garage.”
After an exhaustive sixteen hour search of the surrounding neighborhoods, authorities finally turned up the missing car, slightly worse for the wear. Joshua Mitchell was an eyewitness to the events that unfolded. “So, like, this girl pulls up in her LeBaron, and she looks totally hot, but I’m like, dude, control yourself, she looks like she’s about fifteen. I went up and was like ‘Whoa girl, should you be driving out here?’ And she’s all, ‘Look bitch. You better make me a ramp right now. Cause I’m gonna get this bitch airborne.’ And when a little girl tells you that, you better fucking listen. God knows what she would’ve done if [I] hadn’t.”
While disappointed with the destruction of their car, Michelle’s parents were elated to see their daughter return home safely. “We’re just glad we paid our insurance premium this month,” said John Perens, a local attorney. “Of course, we’re very happy that our daughter is safe, but now that she’s back home with us, we need to come at this from a financial perspective.”
Influenced by the Internet?
Following the incident, detectives at the El Paso Sheriff’s Department began searching for a reason why Michelle might’ve undertaken such behavior. Their search led them to her computer’s Internet browser history.
“Michelle had been visiting a lot of these ‘extreme stunt’ video websites on her computer,” notes Detective Carlos Gutierrez. “One in particular, though, has a video that is almost an exact match for what Michelle was trying to do.”
The site in question is Boredom-Induced.com, a website started several years ago by a group of twenty-somethings in the city of West Palm Beach, FL. The site, which prominently displays a warning indicating that all viewers should be 18 years of age or older, features many videos of the group’s members engaging in what they term “hardcore stunts.”
Upon learning of the site, Michelle’s parents were not amused.
“There’s this site, just on the Internet, where anybody can get to it, and they are just encouraging anybody to go out and get in their cars and just tear [them] up. For fun. These kids are lucky they haven’t died. And I’m lucky my daughter didn’t get seriously hurt imitating them.”
Passing the buck
The founder and operator of Boredom-Induced.com, 23-year-old Florida native Andrew Evans, feels that it is not his responsibility what people do after watching his videos.
“We take all the necessary safety precautions when we do these things. There’s an eighteen-plus [notice] on the front [page]. I don’t know what more I can do.”
Other members of his group seem to feel the same way, albeit in a much less articulated fashion. “liek [sic.] wutever [sic.] i dont care if sum [sic.] dum [sic.] kidz [sic.] r [sic.] dying,” says Chase Millar, long-time friend of Andrew Evans and one of the principal members of Boredom-Induced.com.
Legislation necessary?
While sites such as Boredom-Induced.com may have many fans, they also have a vocal opposition. Sherrie Chatterton is a mother of two, and is the head of Mothers Against Hardcore Stunts, or MAHS.
“We strongly oppose sites such as the one operated by Mr. Evans. The narrowly averted tragedy in El Paso is just further evidence that Capitol Hill needs to immediately consider a law restricting, or even banning, the distribution of these kinds of entertainment on the Internet.”
While not every opponent of this form of entertainment agrees with Ms. Chatteron, they are all in agreement that someone should be held accountable. Jonathon Terry, an El Paso resident, feels the blame lies with the parents.
“The problem with Michelle Perens is not a website. The problem with Michelle Perens, is Mr. and Mrs. Perens, and their absentee parenting. I applaud Mr. Evans and his friends for exercising their Constitutionally protected right to free speech.”
Whether the blame lies with the parents, with people such as Mr. Evans, or with the Federal Government, is still up in the air. At this point, only one thing is for certain: Mr. and Mrs. Perens will be sure to lock up the keys to their new car.
“We’re definitely not going to leave them out on the counter anymore.”
Good advice.
On my eyes, my eeyyyesssss
Thursday, February 23rd, 2006My eyes are burning.
I think it’s a side effect of not sleeping.
This new schedule is really killing me. I’ve been up since around 10pm yesterday. The lack of sleep is affecting my mood. I wanted to sleep all day, but that will just continue the vicious cycle. I really need to just tough it out and crash at around 8 or 9, so that I can get up right before work, and actually be up all day without feeling like I want to just die.
Because, right now, yeah. Want to die, and such.
I need to go find some Visine.
Attack of the Lyrics: Feb. 23, 2006
Thursday, February 23rd, 2006OH MAH GAWD, SO MUCH FLIPPIN’ FEEDBACK FROM THIS ALREADY. It was a joke! Designed to evoke laughter and make certain people not mad at me! It is otherwise meaningless! Besides, how many people have 80’s Power Ballads all about them? You gotta pounce on these things when you spot them.
Babe, tomorrow’s so far away
There’s something I just have to say
I don’t think I can hide what I’m feelin’ inside
Another day, knowin’ I love you
And i, I’m getting too close again
I don’t want to see it end
If I tell you tonight will you turn out the light
And walk away knowin’ I love you?
I’m gonna take you by surprise and make you realize,
Amanda
I’m gonna tell you right away, I can’t wait another day,
Amanda
I’m gonna say it like a man and make you understand
Amanda
I love you
And I feel like today’s the day
I’m lookin’ for the words to say
Do you wanna be free, are you ready for me
To feel this way
I don’t wanna lose you
So, it may be too soon, I know
The feeling takes so long to grow
If I tell you today will you turn me away
And let me go?
I don’t wanna lose you
I’m gonna take you by surprise and make you realize,
Amanda
I’m gonna te ll you right away, I can’t wait another day,
Amanda
I’m gonna say it lik e a man and make you understand
Amanda
You and i
I know that we can’t wait
And I swear, I swear it’s not a lie girl
Tomorrow may be too late
You, you and I girl
We can share a life together
It’s now or never
And tomorow may be too late
And, feelin’ the way I do
I don’t wanna wait my whole life through
To say I’m in love with you
Amanda
Boston
On that thing
Thursday, February 23rd, 2006spiffymarc (11:15:58 AM): so i got the thing for the thing
Emboit (11:16:08 AM): oh that thing
spiffymarc (11:16:11 AM): yeah
Emboit (11:16:11 AM): i love that thing
Emboit (11:16:13 AM): with its things
spiffymarc (11:16:15 AM): it wasnt even that expensive
Emboit (11:16:20 AM): especially that thing it does
spiffymarc (11:16:36 AM): it was kinda tricky to make it do the one thing at first
spiffymarc (11:16:38 AM): but i figured it out
Emboit (11:18:05 AM): hahah
Emboit (11:18:06 AM): ok
Emboit (11:18:13 AM): so what the eff are we talking boot
Conviction: The Pilot
Wednesday, February 22nd, 2006NBC is currently offering a free download of the pilot of their new show “Conviction”. I scooped it up tonight and checked it out.
I’ll start with the requisite comparisons to other shows that you’ve probably already seen. This show appears, to me, to be an attempt to bring the Grey’s Anatomy formula to the courtroom setting. The premise is simple: new, young, inexperienced district attorneys, trying their first cases and dealing with the trivium of their social lives while doing so.
I won’t speak to Grey’s Anatomy, since I still feel that this show is ABC’s retooling of the concept that “Scrubs” is based off of. However, I feel that Conviction uses this formula effectively, bringing a fresh face to a network television line-up already overburdened with lawyer and courtroom dramas.
The show maintains the distinct feel of a Dick Wolf production, with the production design and characters slightly reminiscent of Law and Order. This is definitely not to the show’s detriment, however — Law and Order is a very good show, and, more importantly, a highly successful one. Surely, the network sees the end coming for that franchise, however, and some may see Conviction as the successor to that series.
Since you can get it for free off of the iTunes Music Store, presumably until the date the episode airs, it can’t hurt to give it a download and see what you think. In addition to the pilot episode, NBC is also offering a music video that serves as a promo for the show, as well as a behind the scenes look. The extras videos clock in at around 3 minutes a piece, and are also free to download for now.
Conviction airs on March 3rd on NBC.
Leave Us A Voicemail
Tuesday, February 21st, 2006Want to hear yourself on Dave and Marc’s Awesome Podcast? Well here’s your chance! Leave us a voicemail and tell us something funny, something naughty, something stupid, or just do a promo (“Hey this is blah blah and you’re listening to Dave and Marc on their awesome show”)!
Whats the number, you ask? How can I leave a voicemail for the greatness that is Dave and Marc?
Well, I’m gonna tell you!
In the U.S., call:
(323) 319-6485
CALL ANY TIME, DAY OR NIGHT! And hell, if you call while we’re taping the show, we might just take your call live! YOU NEVER KNOW!
A number for U.K. listeners is coming soon, if there is a demand for it!
Dave and Marc’s Awesome Podcast: Ep. 5
Monday, February 20th, 2006Your weekly fix.
Listen to our fifth episode. Nothing about the Olympics, Willie Nelson, the new sofa bed, science fiction, some entertainment news, notes on killing pedestrians, and more.
Give us your thoughts on the b-i forums!
The Unfortunate Engagement, Part 8
Sunday, February 19th, 2006This is part eight. Read part seven.
John awoke on the floor with a bit of a headache. After a few moments, he was finally able to recall where he was, and who he was. He would worry about the rest later. “What happened?”, he asked. A few more moments passed. He realized that nobody was going to answer. Slowly, he struggled to his feet. Where was Tiffany? Had she gone to get help? He assumed that was the case. He patted himself down, to make sure all the good parts were intact.
It was then that he noticed the note taped to his chest.
He plucked it off, confused, and turned it around to read it.
“John – You knocked your head pretty good. You’re still breathing, I’m sure you’ll be fine. I went to your place to see Joey. If you don’t show up, we’ll come check on you. Thanks for stopping by. Tiffany.”
He stared at the note in amazement. She left? She’s not even here? What if he had been laying on the floor dying? Did she even bother to prop his head up on a pillow? He looked down at where he had been laying. No, she hadn’t! And she went to see Joey?! His head spun. A dull ache still throbbed behind his right eye. He rubbed it profusely, which only made things worse. Carefully, he lowered himself down onto the couch, and studied the note again. His hand slid around behind his neck, his fingers gently dragging across his swollen bite. He wondered if maybe it was skin cancer. That thought made him crack a partial smile. The partial smile horrified him utterly. He shook it off, and went back to studying the note. The fact that she’d abandoned him here would not sink in. He refused to let it sink in. If she could manage to do that, that would mean–
His cell phone began vibrating wildly in his pocket. Ah, yes. He figured he knew who it was. Did he really want to answer, though? He felt no immediate urge to do so. In fact, he didn’t know what to make of any of this. Things that Tiffany had told him randomly surfaced in his mind. The whole situation was a confusing, jumbled mess. He wondered if he had a concussion. The phone continued its incessant vibrating in his pocket. Obviously, Tiffany’s relationship was much more complex than he’d thought. It probably wasn’t just hers, though. People are tricky. This sort of thing probably goes on all the time, and he just wasn’t privy to it. Or maybe he’d been so focused on his own wants, he’d just ignored the wants and needs of the people around him. The phone was practically leaping out of his pocket. Annoyed, he thrust his hand in, pulled out the phone, and flipped it open. “Yes?”
“You’re alive!” It was Brian, a friend of both his and Joey’s. That caught him off guard. He wondered why Brian would be calling. “Hello? John? You there?” He realized that, through the power of technology, he could simply ask.
“Brian. Yeah. What’s up? What do you need, man?”
“Just seeing if you’re up and around. Heard you took quite the spill over at Tiff’s.” News travelled fast. He wondered if he’d missed any calls from his family, or possibly CNN, wanting the exclusive story.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just getting ready to head out.”
“Great. Look, we’re all going over to the theater. Wanted to see if you wanted to go catch a flick.” John looked at his wrist, precisely where a watch would be, if he was wearing one.
“I don’t know if I can make it. Who’s we?”
“Me, Joey, and Tiff so far. No clue what we’re seeing.” John sighed, and looked around the apartment.
“Sure. I’ll be there.”
“Great. Call my cell when you get downtown.”
“No problem.” John closed his phone. He struggled for a moment to make sense of everything that was going on, but after a moment, gave up. There was nothing to make sense of. He looked at his wrist again, and realized that the next time he was at the store, a watch would not be a bad idea. Still, he should get moving if he wanted to get to the movie by a decent time. He couldn’t be out too late. It was a big day at work tomorrow.
The End.