“I’m so glad we’re finally doing this.” She smiled brightly at him from across the restaurant table. He barely noticed. He had no idea why he was here. For days, his rendezvous with her had been the only thing on his mind. His work, his friends, his hobbies, they were all second to this, to her, to this meal. Now that he was finally here, he struggled to think of some way out.
It was the most uncomfortable situation he’d ever been in.
He squirmed awkwardly in his seat, contemplating what could’ve led him to think that he should even try to sit through an entire meal with her. She was the essence of purity in his eyes. She could do no wrong. She was perfect.
“My god, Joey was so jealous when I told him where we were going. This is like his favorite place.”
Unfortunately, the situation was not nearly so perfect.
He glanced up at her nervously, and stopped short of eye contact. “Oh? Heh. I really like this food here.” His hand clenched hard around the side of his chair. Who talks like that? He couldn’t figure out why he’d just said that. A thousand possibilities ran through his mind. He wondered if he’d remembered to arm the alarm on his car.
“Yeah, the food here is great. I really love the breadsticks. And they just keep bringing you more! If you just get the water, you can get out of here without paying anything!” She was so animated when she spoke. It was one of the most endearing things he’d ever noticed in any member of the opposite sex. He definitely hadn’t armed the alarm on his car, he realized. He knew at this very moment, someone was removing the stereo from his car. And there was nothing he could do about it. That thought process was suddenly interrupted by the scent of her perfume.
“The other day, oh god you’ll love this story, Joey and I were playing around on the internet…” Her voice trailed off into the nether parts of his mind. What was he doing? Why had he even arranged this little suaree? It’s not like she isn’t happy with her boyfriend. She manages to coax out at least three amusing anecdotes relating to him every twenty minutes. Each one made his stomach turn. He abhorred this ‘boyfriend.’ He loathed the man. He was the kind of boyfriend that made people wonder. Why would she stay with him? What do they possibly do at night besides fuck? Do they have anything in common?
His fingernails were almost irreversibly buried into the weakening fabric of the chair. It was then that he realized that she wasn’t even wearing perfume.
“Stereos in cars stop working if you disconnect them from the battery, right?”
She stared at him blankly for a moment.
“What?”
He had no idea why he had just asked her that. He cleared his throat. “If you um, if someone stole the radio from my car, it wouldn’t work if they hooked it up to another car, right?” He quickly took a sip of his drink.
“No, I don’t think it will. Why?”
“No reason.”
“What a funny thing to ask! Speaking of which, I was on the phone with Joey the other day, and this song came on the radio…”
He took another sip of his drink. It was going to be a long night.
Read part two.
